The 7 Habits

To be proactive means to take responsibility for your choices and behaviors. Habit 1: Be Proactive is the key to all of the other habits; that why it comes first. Be Proactive says, "I am the leader of my own life. I am the leader of whether I'm happy or sad. I am the leader of how I react to other people or situations."

Talk to your child about being the leader of taking care of himself/herself, taking care of his/her things, reacting or not reacting to other people's comments, and planning ahead.

Suggested titles for young children that reinforce Habit 1:

• King Bidgood's in the Bathtub by Audrey Wood
• The Little Engine That Could by Watty Piper

Expect your child to use words and phrases like choices, responsibility, "Be Proactive," and "stop and think" in his/her conversations this week. You can encourage your child by using some of this language at home. You may have an opportunity to share feelings with your child about BE PROACTIVE.

Begin with the End in Mind means to think about how you would like something to turn out before you get started.  Reading a recipe before cooking or looking at a map before leaving on a trip is beginning with the end in mind.  For young children, a good example is that of a jigsaw puzzle.  Before doing a puzzle, they look at the cover of the box.  They start with the end in mind.

Habit 2 means to have a plan.  I plan ahead an set goals.  I do things that have meaning and make a difference.  I am an important part of my classroom and contribute to my school's mission and vision.  I look for ways to be a good citizen.

Put First Things First means to decide what is most important and to take care of that first.  Thinking about what needs to be done tomorrow or by the end of the week can be overwhelming, especially for children.  Learning to think of which things are the most important and taking care of them first allows children to be less stressed.  

I spend time on things that are most important.  This means I say no to things I know I should not do.  I set priorities, make a schedule, and follow my plan.  I am disciplined and organized.

Think Win-Win is the belief that everyone can win. It’s not me or you—it is both of us. It is a belief that there are enough good things for everyone; it is an abundant way of thinking. Think Win-Win is being happy for others when good things happen to them. As a parent, not everything is negotiable, but if you go into discussions with your child with a win-win mindset, you’ll find a lot less resistance.

Everyone Can Win: I balance courage for getting what I want with consideration for what others want. I make deposits in others' Emotional Bank Accounts. When conflicts arise, I look for Third Alternatives.

Everyone can win, it isn't just me or you - it's both of us.: when conflicts arise, I look for a win-win solution, I consider other people and their wants. I make deposits in others' Emotional Bank Accounts.

Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood means that it is better to listen first and talk second. By taking the time to listen to another person, you reach a higher level of communication. Teaching Habit 5 to young children is done by first considering their age and development. Young children find it difficult to understand another’s paradigm (point of view). This habit is best approached by introducing listening as a skill that should be practiced. Learning to listen without interrupting and learning to listen with your ears, your eyes, and your heart will help children build a foundation for Habit 5. Simply put, we have two ears and one mouth so that we can spend more time listening with the intent to understand.

Listen Before You Talk: I listen to other people’s ideas and feelings. I try to see things from their viewpoints. I listen to others without interrupting. I am confident in voicing my ideas. I look people in the eyes when talking.

Synergize is when two or more people work together to create a better solution that either would have thought of alone. It’s not your way or my way, but a better way. Talk about the equation: 1 + 1 = 3 (or more). How is that possible? 1 person + another person = 2 ideas + many more than either of them would have thought of alone. Synergy is taking good ideas and making them better by working together. Discussions can focus on other examples of synergy in nature, history, literature, and personal experiences. For example, synergy happens in nature when a flock of geese heads south for the winter. They fly in a V formation because due to the updraft, the entire flock can fly farther than if each bird flew alone.

Together Is Better: I value other people's strengths and learn from them. I get along well with others, even people who are different from me. I work well in groups. I seek out other people's ideas to solve problems because I know that by teaming with others, we can create better solutions that any one of us can alone. I am Humble.

Sharpen the Saw means to have balance in your life.  There is a story of a man who was sawing down a tree and not making a lot of progress.  When a passerby asked him why he didn’t stop sawing to sharpen his saw, he remarked that he was too busy sawing.  Habit 7 reminds us that we are more productive when we are in balance – body, brain, heart and soul.  Just like the four tires on a car, if one area is being ignored or overused, the rest will feel the results.  For young children, the car analogy is one they understand; a car could not go on fewer than all four tires.  Explain the four parts of each person (body, brain, heart, and soul) and how important it is to take care of each part to make them all work better.

Balance Feels Best: I take care of my body by eating right, exercising, and getting sleep. I spend time with family and friends. I learn in lots of wqays and lots of places, not just at school. I find meaningful ways to help others.